2004-01-04 - 3:41 a.m.

i never thought the day would come that i would see him drive away forever. i can barely type because my eyes cant open. i have never been in more pain than right this moment. i have made the only person i truly love unhappy.

where did i go wrong?

what did i do?

oh god they say things happen for a reason-but someone tell me what the fuck this reason is. we had a future we had a house in boston we had a dog.

i have nothing anymore beside a pillow that smells like him and pictures he apparently wasn't happy in.