2004-04-25 - 9:02 p.m.

...what i hide behind this smile?

really? i dont know. what am i supposed to say? do you want a comic relief in the long story? i can answer all of your questions with a question mark?

im not holding anything back that you need to know. you need to know im trying my hardest to do great in school. did you hear i made the national honor society for collegiate scholars? you dont need to know i have trouble putting food in my mouth. or crying in the shower is a small comfort. you dont need to know i have spells of anxiety or a broken heart.

you need to know i paint with beatiful colors, and if you are lucky ill paint you. i like daisies but that isnt a invitation.

i like first times. oh how i love firsts. i need a first right about now. its the feeling of sharing something with someone i or they have never experienced before. it is when someone asks have you tried or did you see or has you heart ever felt...you'll think of me.

i tried alligator meat once, you dont need to know, but ill share. i have an undieing passion for boston. it may seem trite but the real reasons will never pass my lips.

i like to girlie movies where in the end everything is all better. but you dont need to know why.

just take me for that smile, and we'll see where we end up. maybe sitting next to me in that boring lecture, or on the T to park street (change here for the red line). probably not either but ehhh..that is life. so ill smile, and you can smile too knowing all you need to know about me will come with time.

because i like time after all. im always running out and you are always losing yours.