2003-04-09 - 11:16 a.m.

i used to hate going to this family's house on south broad street. it was a small white cape, that had one of those diry cold mud rooms and smelled like keroscene heating.

it was cindy's drinking friend, donna. she had these boys, three of them. they were mean little boys.

i used to dread going over there. they'd beat me up. step on my head. throw me out of the tree. spit on me. mind you i was nine or so.

i would try to go tell cindy, but she was no help, she told me to go back outside and play. bitch.

and stevie was no help either..he'd join the "boy's side" once we got there.

the only relief came when i would fall asleep watching willy wonka and the chocolate factory on their dirty couch with a bunch of mut dogs huddling about.

i dont know why it was that movie, probably becuase they had no others, but it always put me to sleep and i could escape cindy's loud drunkin mouth, stevie and the other boy's punches and cuss words.

but now i cant stand to watch that movie, i feel sick everytime i attempt. i wonder if those boys know they scarred me for life?